Growing Your Business is Like Dating: You Can’t Only Have First Dates If You Want Something That Lasts

Lynn Rivest
3 min readJun 3, 2022


Photo by Ave Calvar on Unsplash

The first Zoom date I ever had lasted 8 and a half hours.

We matched on Bumble, and after a few days of fun texting, we decided to ‘meet’ the coming Friday evening.

It was April 2020 during our first lockdown.

We were still getting used to this new Zoom world and while I was looking forward to it, I wasn’t sure quite what to expect.

When the evening came, I poured myself a glass of Malbec, grabbed my laptop, and settled in at the table in my front room.

It Was an Epic First Date

Within minutes, we were crushing this Zoom date. I felt a connection with this handsome Newfoundlander. We talked about deep things and silly things. It was amazing.

He even gave me an impromptu lesson on how to tune my cello using my daughter’s keyboard. I’d decided my lockdown hobby would be to take up the cello again after doing private lessons a few years before.

The hours flew by. We didn’t want the night to end.

It was 3:30am when we finally said goodbye.

In a movie, this is often the beginning of a love story. When two people meet and it feels like they’ve known each other for years.

But that’s not what happened.

Real Life Isn’t Like the Movies

We made plans to meet in person (outside with self-distancing) the following weekend. We texted a bit over the next few days. Then he said he’d need to reschedule our date. I knew that was it. We weren’t going to meet. This was the end of the line for this connection

I was disappointed that things fizzled out but I didn’t dwell on it. It could just be what it was. A lovely discovery and exploration of a connection between two people.

Discovering and exploring is fun.

But it’s not enough if you ultimately want a long-lasting and fulfilling relationship. Without follow-up beyond the exploration, you can’t go deep enough to give a relationship a chance.

Relationships Only Happen When There’s Commitment and Follow-Up

When it comes to dating, the follow-up has to come from two people who are committed to it. But in your business, it’s entirely up to you what you choose to commit to, to go deep with.

In my own business, I’ve been exploring a lot. I’ve had countless epic first dates.

Like many other business owners I’ve coached over the years, I have many different interests and at first, I found it hard not to want to pursue them all. But that’s not possible. And not committing to any one thing leads to frustration and uncertainty.

The resistance to picking one niche or one specific idea seems to be because you don’t want to cut out all the other things you love. But it’s actually because you have no sense of direction. You’re not clear on what you’re working toward.

Your Business Won’t be Sustainable if You Only Explore

If I approached dating like I did my business in the first few months, I would only ever have a lot of first dates. That’s not what I want. For my personal life or for my business.

So I’ve committed to one niche and it has opened up so many possibilities.

I help bold midlife coaches and consultants niche to unleash. When you get specific and simplify your business to focus on one core area, you have a clear point to take off from. You’ll attract the best-for-you clients and you’ll have no shortage of things you can still explore.

If you’d like the support, accountability, and a bit of tough love to get there, I’d love to get to know you and see if I can help. Book a free no-obligation call at



Lynn Rivest

I talk about building a minimalist biz + aging boldly as a midlife entrepreneur.